-deleted the whole negative thingy that I've typed for an hour hahahaha-

Lately I've been I've been losing sleep.

So, I've been a good girl for the past 20 years and I realised I've never done anything super exciting in my life fml lol
Maybe I did, just that I have short term memory. I really can't remember lol
But I really can't think of any. I don't have anything exciting that could leave a deep impression in my mind. Omg
What have I been doing all these years?!
Sometimes I just wanna yolo and do everything I wanted to do but I can't.
My parents would be so shocked and I think everyone will have a heart attack

:'(
The only thing that spiced up my life is all about relationshits :( nooooo
But all the past made me learn and grow. I'm grateful to have them.


Nevermindddd. My bucket list will be completed in the next few years.

So, I'm not sure who will accompany me to do the next challenge. I'm definitely not up to it yet but will try my best. I'm very sure mama see won't allow me to do it alone lol maybe I'll meet someone who is up to it in the next few months. I really want to try to complete by my own (which is extremely hard and I might die lol), but I'm scared too tbh hahaha

The beginning is always the hardest! Hehe


EFFORT.
I like guys who put in lots of effort to love their dream girl.
-melts-

small fact about me: when someone put lesser and lesser effort on me, my feelings will start to fade away. and then kabooom, strangers again. but, if the effort is consistent or increasing, my feelings grow strong and I want to stay with him. I'm not a materialistic person. Money, branded, or fame can't buy me. Things that money can't buy usually takes my heart.
Until now, I've only met a guy who can do that. Only one. We both knew each other so well. We even thought of marriage. Yes. It's that far cos we once thought we can't live without each other. that was the past. (We both moved on happily now and busy with our lives. )


PAST.
Your past made you who you are today. SO TRUE.
my Mei once told me that she's sad because she missed out on her partner's past. That what made him who he is today.
It's true. Every mistakes or things you did in the past influence your future.
Don't be afraid to make mistakes. People grow from mistakes.
I force myself to improve constantly to become a better person.
To become someone who can influence others in different ways.
YES I HAVE BIGGGGG DREAMS.
I'm beginning to give up my dreams and live a simple life lol walao lazy to chase it already lahhh


HOPE.
One must never lose hope.
I've seen a few people around me have lost hope and lost themselves.
There's a friend. He used to be so great. He has everything. But one incident, he lost hope in himself. It affected him badly and he hasn't get over it yet.
DONT LOSE HOPE AND DONT GIVE UP.
It's hard. Sometimes things break us down unexpectedly.
But, believe that the beginning is always the hardest and the joy will come after that.


Oh wow I've created a long post lol
I see an author here HAHAHAHAHAHA
walao I wish writing a 3k words essay is as easy as this.
No need to reference somemore.

But uni life is going to be over soon. BYE BYE JUNIORS. I hope I won't see you next sem lol!

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